Appalachian Trail - Update 2

Hi everyone!

I am staying in a Hostel tonight called "Standing Bear Farm". It is a quaint little place right on the trail. I was supposed to camp tonight, but this place was within a mile of my campsite. I am writing this from the owner's personal computer (on a 24.4 modem no less - yikes). I am 3 miles north of the Great Smoky Mountains and 2 days from Hot Springs. I was able to blow through the Smoky Mountains in 3 days. I took a video with my camera from the observation tower on the top of Clingman's Dome. (The highest peak on the entire 2174 Mile A.T.). I'll write a more detailed message from Hot Springs. Hope all is well with everyone. I miss all of you!

-john a.ka. "lakewood"

by the way, I have officially been given the trail name of "lakewood". Every hiker on the trail has one and that is what you introduce yourself as to other hikers. Mine came from a combination of a town by where I live...and the brand of acoustic guitar that I play.

Appalachian Trail - Update 1

Well, I'm sitting at a computer terminal at the general store in Fontana Village NC. It sits right outside the Smoky Mountains (southern side) at A.T. mile marker 160. So far I'm on schedule but my body is definitely paying for it. I have many sore joints, ligaments and muscles. Tomorrow I will head into the smokys and will try to update again in about 6 days from Hot Springs, NC. So far I've met some of the most amazing people in the past 8 days. Young and old, people of all ages have so many reasons for doing this trail. There's definitely been a lot of trail magic too. Every single hiker I've met, has been extremely nice.

Take care everyone, and I will write again soon!



-john

My last post from civilization...

Well I've gone over everything on all my checklists and I've got everything packed and ready. I guess you could call this the proverbial "calm before the storm". I am down the street from the house I grew up in, at a small coffee house enjoying an awesome cup of "Jamaican me crazy" coffee. It may be my last really good coffee for a while. When I get home, I'm going to enjoy a nice cold beer before I go to bed. It might also be last one of those in a while too.

I have to admit...I am a bit conflicted. Part of me is very excited to be starting this amazing challenge...while part of me is reluctant to leave family and friends. I have to think with a "half-full" mentality or I'm not going to make it longer than a week.

....So with that being said: This is a chance of a lifetime and I'm going to go into it excited.

The next time you here from me, will either be from the trail, or after I get back.



Wish me luck.....

AT - Update

Well I was up till 3:00 AM last night updating my itinerary for my AT hike. It is still very tentative and will probably get changed quite a bit. I actually wrote it out all the way to Maine....just in case. I also included a one week break in the middle so that I can go back to Cleveland to visit friends, check on house stuff, and visit with my family.

I realized today that I forgot my camera upload cord, so I cannot upload any pictures until I take my break in the middle. Wish me luck everyone. I will post once more Monday night before I head out tuesday morning.

-john

Appalachian Trail

Well its official. May 1st I start my AT hike. I don't know how far I will go before I decide to stop, but I will be gone for at least 3 weeks. I have all my gear and food...and reservations...all that remains is for me to sort out my "mail drop boxes" and my "bounce box". I have each post office figured out, i just need to figure out my daily itinerary so that I don't end up at one on a sunday when its closed.

I am very excited about this. Ever since last spring when I was hiking the Smokies with a 50 lb pack, I've wanted to do some/all of the AT....now I will be (about 35 pounds lighter too). I am going to take a ton of pictures but may not get them uploaded until I'm done with my hike. If I make it through a town with an internet cafe' or something, I will post blog entries.

On a side note, I found a journal I had started writing in last year and I realized despite it being a very long/difficult year, I have actually accomplished many things that I set forth as goals for myself last year. On April 14th '06 I wrote this:

"So I'm pushing 30 with no real direction. Here are some things I've come up with that I want to do:

- Take a class or classes in Geology and Geography locally
- Write some songs and play out more
- Volunteer for U.S.G.S
- Volunteer for Habitat For Humanity
- Go on 3 or more hiking trips
- Study for GRE and take
- Investigate Graduate Schools...Apply???
- Investigate a Europe trip
- Visit Aaron and/or take Road Trip
- Get passport
- Buy MacBook
- Sell House and get Apartment
- Get out of the house more....go to more open mics
- Play more pinball!
- Get a new car
- Record 1 or 2 songs at Mike's Studio (Ante Up)
- Start my own open mic night"


Looking at that list now I realize that one year later, I have done every single thing on it (except "Start my own open mic" and techinally my house hasn't sold yet). In my mind, it seems like I haven't done much over the last year, but now I know that I have at least tried (even if it was subconciously) to accomplish some goals. I think I will write a new one for next april:

- Complete at least half of the Appalachian Trail
- Complete sale of house and pay off car
- T/A freshman Geology course
- Decide on Advisor
- Decide on Research interests
- Decide on Thesis
- Investigate possible career paths
- KEEP IN TOUCH WITH CLEVELAND FRIENDS
- invite family and friends to come to PSU to visit.....often
- email Cleveland Clinic engineers
- Play out acoustic in State College

Thats it for now...

-john

Random stuff

Well I found a place in State College PA. Its Very small, but it is perfect for me. I spent the weekend u-hauling the big stuff there so that if the house sells, I don't have to move out on a moment's notice.

...so I've come up with my first travel destination for the summer too. The first week of May, I'll be leaving for Amicalola State Park in Georgia. (Fly to Atlanta, shuttle to Amicalola). What the Hell is in Amicalola State Park John? Incidentally, it is the Southern Terminus to the Appalachian trail. I've decided I'm going to hike as much of the trail as I feel like (until I get bored or too sore). I have enough food/supplies to go for up to 45 days If I want. I will sending myself supply packages along the way to Post offices along the trail...and will hopefully be sending postcards out too. No matter where I finish, I can always continue where I leave off later on in my life. Should be pretty fun. There will be a lot of people on the trail around this time, so I hopefully won't get too lonely either.

I am also hoping I can coordinate with some friends and have them meet me at certain points to do a few days with me. I know my friend Pat said he'd do 4-5 days when I'm in the Smoky Mountains. if there's anyone reading this that also wants to do a few days with me, let me know.

I made myself a "to do" list of things I have to do before May 1st. Lets just say, its going to get a lot more stressful, before I can finally de-stress. I am determined to get everything done though.

I am a little nervous about starting school this fall....mostly just because I haven't decided specifically what I want my research to be in. Most incoming grad students already know their advisor and research before they even start. I hope to take a few classes my first semester and figure it out from there.

Can't believe I'm 30...and going to be a student again.

long awaited sigh of relief...

first the short answer factoids:

As of today...I am officially a Nittany Lion.
As of 4/15...I will be unemployed (yikes)
As of 5/1...I will taking some well deserved time off traveling (still planning this)

without going into too much detail...I will say that the past two months have been extremely difficult. Making this decision has been the hardest I have ever made. Every time I would come to a decision, I would literally change my mind the next day. It never seemed that I had a good enough reason to go....or stay. I just kept researching and researching....and looking for that true answer to this. I had lists full of pros and cons for both staying and going. It seemed that I was consistantly trying to convince myself Not to go. Every time I would, I would realize that the reason wasn't quite good enough. I really thought that if I waited long enough, I would have some kind of epiphany....a moment where i would know for sure my answer. I asked every person close to me what their opinion was, and everyone had a different take.

In the end it was somthing very simple that did it for me. I was listening to someone give a talk on friday and she said something like "how many of you said when you were a kid that you wanted to work in a cubicle when you grow up?"

I know I didn't. When I was a kid, all I ever wanted to be was a scientist. I was never sure exactly what kind...but I knew I wanted to study science. Here I have the best offer I could imagine in front of me, and I was actually considering turning it down.

Three days later, I put in my two weeks at work.


All that being said, I am so far out of the fegy comfort zone it is insane. As excited as I am, I am also terrified. It is not in the fegy blood to take risks like this. I literally quit a job of 8 years of which I was vested at...with a nice 403B and great benefits.

Maybe I'm inadvertantly starting a new fegy trend here. hopefully. The world needs more risk takers.


If I crash and burn....I can't ever regret not-trying.

some tough decisions

more than anything, it is crucially important to me that i take some "john time" this summer to refresh my mental batteries. Any of you that have spent time with me in the past month or two, know just how passionate I am about this. More so than grad school or a change of career itself. There is no point diving into a whole new life situation, if I am not mentally ready for it....no matter what it may be.

With that in mind, I find myself in a tough position. to a normal outsider, it is a no-brainer. I however, see things a bit differently.

I have not said anything about my Penn State visit, becuase I've needed time to think a lot before saying anything. I still do.

Exactly what I did not want to happen is beginning to happen. I am stressing about my house, school, work, insurance, where to go this summer, will i have enough time for "myself", new zealand, blah blah blah.


long story short: I did in fact get an offer letter from penn state....with a nice financial package as well. Putting aside New Zealand for sec, if i accepted this offer at PSU, financial it would be great move. Plus i could start in the fall. The problem is...with all that I have to take care of, I worry I may not have enough time for myself this summer. this may sound arrogant to anyone else....but i absolutely need this time...and i need it stress free. I want to travel, you know? finally say the mental goodbyes that I've needed to say for a couple years now.

so the way I see it is that I have 3 realistic options:

- I could accept, and bust ass in march and april, and probably still have june and july to do what I need to do....but i might not. If the house doesn't sell, or something else comes up, its too late, I've already accepted.

- I could accpt, but defer my enrollment for one year. The school had already told me i can do this and that I don't lose any of my award money or the TA position i was offered. problem here is...I don't really need a whole year...and I'm already in my thirties as is. I'm not getting any younger. If i were 25...there's no question I would defer.

- I could forget it all together and not go. (this goes back to the whole, stay at my job and suck it up thing)


i have spent the whole day so far thinking about just what things might hold me in Cleveland this summer, and most of them I could have taken care of by either friends, by hiring someone, or by granting power of attorney to someone.

I'm starting to think that It might just be possible to have my cake and eat it too. I can tell you one thing though. I refuse to fall back on my Fegy gene, of over-cautious conservatism. Maybe just once, i need to say "F*** it" and just do it.

I have a 5 day road trip that I leave for on the 12th with best friend. I respect him and his opinion more than just about anybody on this planet. I am setting a date of march 18th to make my final decision. I cannot procrastinate, or stall on any of these decisions

One last note: The school and department were amazing. I was extremely impressed. I plan to write more about the school experience itself a little later.

Blue Monday

I like winter...really I do. In fact, I like all seasons.  I spent my lunch break at work today thinking a lot about last year....not about bad things, actually quite the opposite.  I thought about how much fun I had last summer with my hiking, playing live out at the bars, prepping for grad school apps, taking classes, and seeing family and friends.  Normally I don't get in "ruts"...but today I really thought back to all those good memories and realized how apathetic I feel right now...particularly today.  I don't know why.  I just feel really unmotivated with little if any desire to "get out there" and "do things".   I just don't feel like doing much of anything.  My shows have been cancelled, Its too cold to hike, I don't know whats going on with grad school, and I'm only taking one easy class.  (among other things)

Then sure enough...I end up on cnn.com, or fox news or something and I read that today, Jan 22nd, is actually the most "depressing day of the year".  It's actually called blue monday.  Some professor in the UK determined some formula based on all these factors and determined that today, of all days, is when I should feel the crappiest. 

Does this explain this? Or is it just a my way of rationalizing it?  Heck, maybe its just a coincidence.

Mentality of a Pack-Rat

I have recently found myself going through all of my closets and cleaning up. A sort of mother-of-all spring cleanings. Throughout the process something became very clear to me. Let me explain...

I remember right after I graduated from college I lived in my own apartment for 1 year. When I moved, it took my 2 evenings to box stuff up, and a single day to load one UHaul truck. I moved my entire "life" in one truck load. It was simple....I lived simple. I had what I needed an no extraneous stuff. I liked it that way.

Over the course of the past 8 years I have been acquiring....and acquiring....and acquiring. With the extra room in the house, I would simply store something away in the attic if I didn't need it for a while. Well...if you don't use something for 3 years, you probably don't need it.

There are boxes and boxes of stuff in my attic. things I bought that I thought I needed, and things that I've acquired through various birthdays, christmases, and other occasions. Why do I have all of this crap? I don't need any of it.

Why don't we ever throw stuff away? Its just material stuff anyway. Most of it, we don't need. It's amazing how much our houses just "fill up".

Well, I'm done with it. I'm going on a Goodwill, Salvation Army, Purple Heart...rampage. Everything I don't need is getting donated, thrown out, or garage saled.

I made a 2007 resolution to start fresh and new....and I am. Sure there'll be some things I keep, but not many.

I am going to be very busy the next few nights. But it will all be over soon.


-john